Managing self-esteem

What is self-esteem? What can affect it? And how can we try and improve low levels of self-esteem? Discover the answers to this and more below.

Many of us have suffered from a low level of self-esteem at some point in our lives, which can lead to negative feelings about our own abilities, lack of confidence, reluctance to try new experiences, and difficulty achieving our full potential in our work, studies, relationships etc.

These feelings can be overwhelming, but it is important to remember that we are not alone in feeling like this and there are steps we can take to try and improve our self-esteem.

What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem, in basic terms, is how you estimate yourself – the value you place on yourself and your own abilities.

Everyone has an idea about how they would like to be, or an ideal self. If a person’s view of themselves is close to how they would like to be then they could be said to have quite a high level of self-esteem. It is important to note that an ideal self can be a self who accepts all aspects of their personality and who feels comfortable with who they are – it does not necessarily mean a perfect self.

When self-esteem is low you can feel very bad about yourself and your abilities, and even if your beliefs about yourself don’t match reality, they are still real to you because you believe them to be true. This is why sometimes it is very difficult to feel good about ourselves when we are suffering from low self-esteem, even when other people tell us that what we are feeling about ourselves has no basis.

Having a healthy level of self-esteem is important as it means you can feel ok about yourself while still respecting the needs and feelings of others. It’s important that you feel comfortable with yourself and who you are. It is all about knowing, respecting, and liking yourself as an individual.

What affects self-esteem?

The good news about self-esteem is that it is not fixed. Even if you feel that you have low self-esteem now, it doesn’t mean that you will always feel like this. Self-esteem levels vary in different aspects of our lives and can change according to circumstances. For example, self-esteem can be affected when a relationship that was important to us ends. Other things that may affect our self-esteem include:

• Social life
• Personal experiences
• Home
• School or college

All of these things can affect how we view ourselves in either a positive or a negative way. For example, if you did well in a test or exam it would affect your view of yourself in a positive way, whereas if you didn’t do as well the effect might be negative.

Self-esteem can also be affected as we move from one stage of life to another. For example, many young people feel very uncertain and vulnerable in who they are and where they fit in the world when first embarking on life as independent young adults away from familiar support networks, and this could lead to lower levels of self-esteem in some situations. However, taking on new challenges and overcoming the fears of a new place, job, group of people, etc. can lead to something even better, and boost self-esteem and confidence.

Your shout!

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